It is the most precious moment of my day, this ‘little birth’. Right before really waking up, right before my mind starts to run its usual course, right before the hustle bustle of the day begins, right before ‘all the things to do’. There is this moment of complete receptivity. And for some it might only last for not even a second, or they might not even be aware of its existence at all. But I am lucky that I can enter that space and be in ‘complete clarity’.
Sometimes it lasts a few seconds, sometimes a minute and sometimes I can extend it for minutes even up to an hour. It brings me in connection to that undercurrent in my life. Away from all the distractions. Maybe it is something that I developed in the year I spent in a floatation tank: when I noticed very clearly how the process of seperating from your body takes place and I was able to hold on to the information I received and bring it in my conscious awareness.
I call it the most precious moment of the day. It is right when I can connect to everything, right before I wake up. I can ask questions: about my partner, about my daughter, I get information about my body, about unseen worlds, but above all I get sparks of creativity. It is the moment of clear information exchange. The moment of getting a clear flash of inspiration, or understanding. Or information about something or somebody. Or my body tells me its needs more water. Or it wants to eat clay. Or a client for that day already tells me their full story and the key to a resolution. Or the other day, it was when my dog who is in heat told me: I have escaped and am running around at the beach with ‘another dog’. (And to my surprise she in fact had opened the heavy sliding door and had escaped for the first time!)
But most of all I love it when in these moments ‘inspiration hits’, when an idea sparks my creativity. When there is this sense of complete alignment, alignment with who I am and what I came here to do. It always makes me realize that we are ‘Creators in the first place’. That in order to experience fulfillment in everything you do it is about ‘Being Yourself’, and doing what makes you unique. And for me the key is right in this moment of waking up. The beautiful thing about this moment is the multilayered-ness. The way in which you get a glimpse of that much larger version of you. The understanding of all the things that are driving you: the programming of parents, ancestors and society, your unique make up, and that part in you that wants to keep going, that is on a mission. Like described in my favourite book at this moment: ‘Goodnight stories for Rebel girls’. With stories about women ‘who kept going no matter what, because something inside is driving them.’ There is a few things that I do in that first moment when I wake up: I keep my head still As soon as I ‘enter my body’ I keep my head in the same position. I know that as soon as I move it, I will lose it all. Sometimes it works, or sometimes it doesn’t work: I already moved my head and all is lost. Then I ask myself : what is there to know? Sometimes I ask myself a specific question about my body. I scan my body for pains, or issues, and usually I get a very direct answer. Not so much that pain is immediately gone but more like it is as if my body is saying: ‘Ohhh, you are working on this.’ But mostly I just ask: ‘What is there to know?’ The answer sometimes really surprises me. It can be about anything.
I expand the space It is literally as if I am in a bubble and I try to concentrate on that bubble to expand in all directions. Or if had to describe it differently I define the bubble and then hold space for it. So I am making a statement that I want to stay in this space, and not let any distractions in. Or I can invite other aspects to come in the space, one after another, but this is more an advanced technique.
I make Connections It sometimes literally feels like I am ‘weaving’, I can see how I am making cords, ore connections to a future, or to earlier stages in my life, especially around birth. Sometimes there is a deep sense of ‘being on the right path’, or being part of a bigger collective, or being part of a group, or call it a wavelength, and in ‘making connections’ I feel like I am
strengthening those parts of me.
I write it down to keep it alive This is becoming a new habit. I usually always thought: ‘Ohh, I will remember this’, but the truth is, I would mostly always forget. So forcing myself to jot it down in a sentence or two will keep it alive. Sometimes it is just a zipped folder of information Sometimes, or quite often actually, what is presented to me is ‘something unknown’. It is information that is not clear. I see it as a ‘zipped folder’. I cannot perceive what is inside, but I trust, that it will unzip over time. So during the day I remind myself of that ‘zipped folder’ as an energy, or a shape, a smell, or something. To be okay with the fact of the ‘unknown’ is helping me tremendously. It needs time to simmer and assimilate and then ‘whoosh’ the inspiration hits.
Forget about it during the day, and it is okay to get distracted After I awake: I let it all go. During the day it usually becomes like a small presence in the background, or it feels like a support in my back. And even if I am very distracted it sometimes gives me the nudge, that distraction is good. That there is so much unknown that wants to present itself and can only reach you if you seem ‘distracted’. After all:
“In chaos, there is fertility.” ― Anaïs Nin